Let us make, the greatest story ever.

[kyzen]

I this we should write the greatest story ever. We all like to talk shit, and I'm sure we can do better that 1000 monkey's typing for 1000 years. I don't know what made me do this, I just want to see where it goes. Once the story has come to it's natural ending, I reakon I'll get it made into an ebook, and with morgs awesome pagemaking skills, a hard back novel (maybe not :shake).

I'll just lay down a few simple rules (I hate that word "rules" as I spent most of my youth trying to break as many as I could), anyways!

Rules:

You May:
Write what ever you want in the theme of the story (what ever the hell that may end up being, i.e. if it's on earth, don't change the venue to the moon or anything like that ;)), keep it to about 250 words at a time, and let someone else carry it on.

You May Not:
Spam... that is all :) Don't ruin it for the other people.

Could you do your posts in 2 sections:

Body and Comments :)

Do the Body normal, and the comments italics.

Like So:

Something, then something, and something awesome... and so forth! Then, without warning, BLAH happened, and all were amazed at the size of the blutac...

My inspiration for this section was from bum's, I like the character development of ungaboonga, he is good, I think it should take this direction, or at least focus more on such and such...


If we keep it awesome, I reakon we could even make it into a movie ;) Happy writing :)

[axl_morgs]

The sound of one hand clapping made him laugh. This was no ordinary hand, for it was attached to the arm that was on the right hand side of a spastic child's torso. Being a shopping centre security gaurd was as far up the chain of command this guy ever got. He tried out in the army, the navy and even the boy scouts, but noone saw in him anything of redeemable value, so he tried out for a security gig and this is where he is now.

"Excuse me mate can you pleaes stop that you are annoying the shoppers"

The spastic kid dribbled something in his general direction, at which point the gaurd grabbed the kids wheelchair and ran as fast as he could. He always wanted a free spastic that could entertain him, and now was his big chance. He raced through the crowded shopping centre and as he was about to smash through the automatic glass doors he woke up.

His sheets were covered in sweat. And a sticky substance. Damnit he thought, another wettie over a downie. He got up, walked to the bathroom to clean up. When he finished, he headed out to the kitchen to get a drink. What he saw when he got there nearly made him spew in terror.

Sitting there, at the table, dribblin away like a leacky tap, was the downie. He couldnt believe it. Did he really kidnap this kid? He didnt remember anything. Then the downie said something he had no idea how to interpret.

"i like da kitcchhae xixsd vc'"

He had no idea how this kid got there, but he was damn sure he wasnt gonna let that kid dribble on his favourite beer coasters. As he lent over the table to get the coasters, the downie stood up. Straight! His face morphed into the right proportion, his chest heaved and his arms and legs stretched. The downie was now 7ft tall and built like a brick shithouse.

"what the fuck"

The new super sized downie tore off his clothes to reveal a spandex suit, muhc like superman, except more wet from the dribble, with a big D on it.

"I am thuper downieeeeeeeee" he said, his downie-ness voice still clinging to his throat.

To be continued...

I got the inspiration for this from seeing a downie clap. Thats about it really.

[SPOT]

*i am drunk and its 5:04 in the mornin and i have just made a big plate of pasta*
*damo and ayds are asleep in the lounge, maybe i should turkey slap them??*


as the downie stood up the dude gaped in awe, never had he seen a downie with such co-ordination!!
"i am super downie" the downie bellowed.
the dude trembled i fear.
he didn't know what to do!!
pee started to flow down the side of his trowsers as the monsterous man rose to the ceiling.
"what do you offer me" said the one with the extra chromesone.
'"i offer nothing but myself" said the dude as he turned away and presented his buttocks to the super downie.

[Eoin]

Unsure of what the small non-downie was doing, the super-downie reverted back to his usual behaviour at such times (such times as when he didn't know what was going on. This happen quite a lot as you can imagine). This consisted of simultaneously excavating his nostril and pawing his clammy hands over whatever was in reach at the time. Being seven feet tall, he could reach quite a lot.

The man turned around, pulled up his pants as anger overcame his embarrassment at being turned down by a down syndrome "I'm losing my touch" he thought.

"Stop wrecking my stuff, you freaking downie!" he yelled as he tried to move the more breakable items and his beloved beer coasters out of super-downies considerable wingspan. The downie looked nonplussed at this interruptions to his quiet reverie and then walked off, straight into a wall, which disintegrated in his wake, leaving only a trail of dribble leading out into the street.

"damn!", the man (who was called Damo :)) exclaimed. "I'll bet I get blamed for this." As he ran out into the suburban Ballarat street.



Just a basic continuation of the super-downie story but I decided that the lead hero should be called Damo :)

[radass]

Damo's world had come crashing down around his ears. He slowly backed into the corner of the room and looked on in horror as the super downie wrecked havok on the street. His secret shame exposed, he clutched at a nearby cushion and started sobbing gently to himself. Knowing only one way to restore comfort and happiness, he lowered his trowsers and probed the available anus below with his right thumb. Giving his thumb a good sniff, he burst into a fresh, stronger round of tears. "This can't be happening," he cried. "Not again."

standard shame driven shite i come up with in the absense of a real idea

[axl_morgs]

As Damo was sniffing his now semi-brown finger, he felt a sudden sense of relief, as if it was all over with. How wrong he was. The super downie saw Damo sniffing his finger and roared in rage.

"Bwaaaaaaaarreeeeeeeoooppu uuuuu!" he shouted.

Damo turned with a startled look on his face. He didnt know wether to run or get his cock out. He decided for the latter and this further enraged the super downie.

"SHDOP IT!!!" he roared.
Damo quickly did up his zip and put his hands under his armpits.
"what is it super downie?" he asked.
"you gannot wased dime. you muss find da ewotic lovabull uncle to help you gather together the spastic superheroes"
"the what?"
"no time for repeating now go go go!"

Damo was confused. He knew he had 7 uncles, and none of them were erotic. Or loveable. Then he remembered that his mother was real, wasnt a figment of his imagintion, and realised he had 12 uncles on her side. Her mum was a hoe. Then a name came to his head. Started with D but he couldnt put the rest together.

D....A?...E??...V??? Some combination of those words. He ran to his address book to see wether or not it would help. it did. Dave was his name. Loveable uncle dave. he lift not far from Damo so he jumped in the car, had a quick tickle of his anus and sped off towards his loveable uncle.

I got inspiration from this from the wisdom of farts

[radass]

Suddenly, he realised that his old friend morgs was gay, right in the bumbum.

[mudgie]

Dave cringed as the plastic doll pinched his wang for the 14th time. Suddenly, he heard the screech of tires outside of his house, so he deflated 'Rosey' and quickly cleaned up.

He soon heard an anxious banging on his front door.

He answered it, and sure enough, it was his nehpew Damo. Attached to the back of Damo's car was a red wagon with that downie he sometimes saw at the mall. The wheels had nearly melted off, but the wagon had not fallen over during the speedy journey.

"Sup my 52nd nephew?" Uncle Dave said. "This downie said that you could assemble the super downies" Damo panted. "Yesserie," Dave said, sniffing his finger and recoiling in disgust. "Come with me to the Dave Cave".

They took the fireman poles down to the Dave Cave. Lined up against the wall were 5 downies with clown suits on, and blindfolded with handcuffs around their wrists and feet.

"Derrrrrrrrrr!!" They yelled.

"Uh, I keep them here... In case I... Need them," Uncie Dave stammered, a little embarrassed.

Damo looked down, and saw they were standing in a mini lake of drool.

Just seeing his love slaves again made Dave bar up. "If I didn't have guests," he thought to himself "I'd really be pushing some poo right now!"

I got my inspiration from that night in Vegas with Spot. And I have a perverted imagination.

[SPOT]

"pushing some poo right now" Dave thought too himself.
*tinglely music, screen starts to wave, other dream sequence stuff*
Dave was skipping through a field of flowers, hand in hand with his nephew Damo's father...Joshu.
Suddenly Dave trips and Joshu lands on top of him,
"God i love you Joshu" whipsers Dave.
"I love you too Dave, my cuddly bear" replies Joshu.
"I want to shower you in 1's and 0's" says Dave seductively.
"Let's code!!" screams Joshu.

"Uncie Dave!!" exclamed Damo.
"Oh!! sorry child, I was remembering the fun your father and i used to have in the fields" answered Dave hastily.

"I need the JUSTICE LEAGUE OF SUPER DOWNIES!!" claimed Damo.

"Oh my whatever for dear??" Dave questioned.
"I need them to join with this one here, i think he called himself...KENNY" said Damo.

"Well" said Dave as he gestured to the chained downies, "There are from the left, SUDDY, CRAWZ, SPOT, EMPS and finally the most disgusting of them all...THE_BALANCE!!" boomed Dave.

"They all have special powers, SUDDY, has the ability to turn invisible and blend in with his surroundings, he becomes THE DARKNESS!!,
CRAWZ is blessed with the power of elasticity, he can stretch out to reach great heights and bend around corners,
SPOT is my least favourite as he is covered in thick, coarse hair. Anyone who comes near him is absorbed into his being.
EMPS has the magical, and i think sick ability, to attract illegally young girls to him and ensnare them with his silk producing 'glands' and trap them in his lair,
and finally THE_BALANCE has the most unique powers of all!!"

"What are they Uncie Dave??" probed Damo.
Dave shuddered, "THE_BALANCE has the magic power of being good at everything!! no matter what it is, he can do it"

My inspiration also comes from that night in Vegas with mudgie and our Vegas hooker wives, who just sent me a postcard of them with their new husbands

[Eoin]

Damo was stricken with total revulsion as he realised that it was barely into the day and he had already had to share a room with far too many downies. Even this array of super downies was turning his stomach, regardless of their purported super abilities (which Damo was now beginning to doubt as they simply sat there bound, making incoherent blubbering noises.)

"This is fucked guys" he muttered "I'm outta here"

He turned to leave and found his way barred by uncle Dave, the glistening pile of man-power that he was, who spoke lowly, and with more than just a hint of menace "You got invloved in this thing Damo, don't think that you're getting out it this easy."

Damo, gulped as he backed slowly into the cave, and then, in a resigned voice he mumbled "fine, just, let's get this over and done with."



I chose to introduce some complexity into the character of Damo, making him something of a reluctant party to the madness that will surely follow. I also chose to make the Dave character tougher cos he just needed to be.

[axl_morgs]

***

Meanwhile, deep in the catacombs of southern victoria, a man with a humongous head and a big bald cunt are schemeing something evil.

"I reckon we should be able to take down those downies" says he with the gargantuan cranium.
"as do i" replied the big bald cunt.

Their plan was simple, yet dastardly. THey would lure the biggest downie into a trap. It was quite simple to lure downies to do anything. There once was a man from nantucket, who got a downie to eat a bucket full of cow piss. The downie was told it was a bucket of "DOWNIE JUICE" which has been long believed to be the only thing that can turn a downie into a normal human being.

"I say we try to lure him into our caverns with promises of copious amounts of sex with many buxom young maidens"
THe big bald cunt nods in agreement. There was only one problem. Where to get all the bitches. They racked their brains for hours at a time, booze and crap 80s movies keeping them from their mission.

Then it came to them. They would goto a place called LAN-ZILLA and kidnap all the bitches from there and take them to their caverns. It was the perfect plan. The downies will be told that their would be a fruitful supply of buxom young virginal maidens, and all they will be greeted with are buxom young virginal fagnuts.

"lets get this shit happenin eoin" says the dude with the big head.
"word morgs"

And so they began....


Inspiration from some belly button lint

[SPOT]

And so they began indeed.

Eoin began to urinate into a bucket, while morgs began to sift some self raising flour.

Mixing the two together they made PISSY CAKES!!
Finally their best laid plans will come into fruition.
After packing the PISSY CAKES into decorative boxes, Eoin and Morgs then placed them around Buninyong to lure the LAN-ZiLLA bitches into their wating clutches.

Inspiration = John Safran VS God and they were talking about urination right at the end. The PISSY CAKES just come from my sick imagination and i reckon it would be funny if someone did that!!

[mudgie]

A horde of Lanzilla Bitches soon massed outside the lair of the Big Bald Cunt and the Big Cranium guy. They had followed the trail of Pissy cakes, and were outside sobbing because they had eaten all of the urine filled snacks.

"Mwahaha," laughed the villans. "Those Super Downies will never be able to resist the temptation of this virgin asses!!" They chuckled evilly like when Uncie Dave watches beastiality.

The scent of unwashed Lanzilla Bitches soon caught the nose of the Super Downies in the Dave Cave.

Crawz stretched his nose (with the power of elasticity) and inserted it between the buttcheeks of a Counter Strike player.

He sniffed long and deeply, his eyes looking upwards in ecstacy.

"Virgin asses!" He cried, and stretched out his dick to the nearest lamp post. "Every one, dake my hrannnnnnd!" Every one did.

He and everyone flew towards Buningyong and landed in a heap of colourful helmets, drool, and squinted eyes.

The Big Bald Cunt and the Large Head guy sprang forth from their places of hiding. "Bwahehehe!" they laughed. "Erm, say Downies, would you like to drink from this bucket of Downie normalizing?"

The Downies turned thier heads, flicking a trail of drool over everyone else.

"Meeee firrrrssssssssssssst!" yelled Empz - but suddenly, 5 eight year old girls were attracted to him like a magnet, and he was knocked down.

Damo soon realised, after drinking 3 glasses, that the super Downie juice wasn't what the two evil people said it would be. It was piss!

He said to Dave "Fucking hell! That stuff is piss!" to what Dave replied "Really?! You should've said so earlier!" He ran over and dunked his head in the bucket, like he did when he was a boy with his Aunt Lynda.

Spot became aroused, and began jacking furiously.

THIS PART TO BE OMMITTED FROM THE BOUND AND PUBLISHED VERSION OF THIS STORY - STORY NAZI

[Eoin]

I'm not a big fan of that addition to the story to be honest

[mudgie]

*Sulks in the corner*

[axl_morgs]

That previous addition was wiped quickly from everyones memory...as it was just a bizarre dream that the deformity known as mudgie was thinking. Mudgie wasnt a part of the Z bitches, he was a normal, everyday dick and was stuck playing doom 2 to all hours of the morning...

...the story now picks off in buninyong, on a quiet sunday afternoon as Morgs and Eoin are sneaking around the bushes- "hey you behind the bushes!!!" roars an unseen man. Eoin and Morgs hit the deck. "eoin go get him" whispers morgs. Eoin jumps up and runs straight to where the voice came from. As he gets there he realises he has two choices: beat the fuck outta this cunt or beat the fuck outta this cunt. He chooses the latter. A few swift kickboxers and karate chops and the odd squirell grip later, and the unknown man is down. For good.

"good work eoin"
"morgs you suck"
"why?"
"you make me do all the fighting!"
"yeah thats cause im a pascifist and i havent finished my new weapon yet"
"you been workin on that fuckin thing all year long!"
"quiet eoin. here have a guiness"
"mmmm guiness"

After finishing his pint of guiness eoin lets out an almight great big burp. They crack up laughing but they soon compose themselves and begin to plant the PISSY CAKES around the area.

Three hours later, 43 pints of guiness and 25 jack and cokes later, the two evil masterminds of this most heinous plot have finished, stumbling back to their caverns.

"hey eoin lets play ut really pissed"
"hahaha ok"

****

Meanwhile, Damo has got an idea!

More inspiration from the depths of my gaping anus

[mudgie]

Arr, suck ye cocks.